Consistency !

So I thought I'd update whoever reads this on what's going on.

Chris got into BYU. Yay ! Class starts June 18th.We've gotta let BYU know by May 1st. Yay for decision making time. It makes me frustrated that so many people were upset and assumed we were automatically leaving. So I'd get all these "rude" remarks but they were said with a smile or a laugh or JK so I guess I can't take them seriously. But everyone's like Chris can go, but we want you to stay. Or I don't like what I heard. Especially from people I have hardly any contact with. Why does it matter to you? Anger ! So those people I want to just tell off and then leave, just to spite them.

But then I have the wonderful people that listen to me about my concerns, and want whats best for us. Those are my favorites. I always just tell everyone, we're just trying to do the right thing. We want to be where we're supposed to be, where the Lord wants us. And I get 2 responses. 1) I understand that and good luck with deciding. 2)Oh I already know and its here. Oh, YOU know what we're supposed to do with our lives? OH God told YOU what we're supposed to be doing... oh that must be nice.

Sorry, this seems mean. I promise I'm typing this with a smile.

But our decisions (mostly mine) are back and forth and I can't seem to pin down one or the other. As soon as I mentally decide on one i think of all these things good or bad and flip flop to the other. I can't ever make a decision. I told someone yesterday that  I'm going to just make a talley and keep track of who tells us to stay and go and we'll go with the opposite of the majority. Right now its like 20 to stay and 2 to leave. So... unfortunately, we won't make our decision that way.

Our biggest concerns are: Chris' credits, which all transfer, but most of them are electives. I'm worried since really, who needs that many electives, that he's going to be behind in school out there to catch up in the curriculum. And I don't want him in school any longer than he has to be. And we don't even know yet if he can get into the business school out there. School is tougher and I don't want him having any trouble passing classes and prolonging graduation. Here at Marshall, he's got his major, he's got his schedule figured out, and we have an end point. And he's got a good degree in mind that I'm a fan of him getting.  So that's big concern #1.

Number 2, is money. Well more specifically my job. So I can get a job in a lab or whatever, paying pretty close to what I make now. But I'm afraid it actually might come out to be a pay cut. And even if I make the same amount as here, the cost of living is higher. So I should make more. And bills always stress me out. And how will Chris do handling a tougher curriculum and trying to work :/ So money is a huge thing for me. Regardless of where I'm living. I stress about it now and we pay practically nothing in our apt.

But we both do want to go to Utah. There are so many reasons to go. We want the environment out there, and they people. I miss having good LDS people around that I won't have to worry about conversations and what they get into. I hate some of the things I hear people talking about here and it makes me sad. Sarah I love you, this is not a reflection on you. And I don't only want to have LDS people in my life. Its hard to explain. But I can explain my thought process to you. Especially since I'm sure if I put my true feelings on here someone might feel like I'm talking about them and then that won't be good.

There's a lot of other little-ish things. But we're kind of at a stand still. We've prayed and fasted and prayed some more. We sorta discussed it seriously for the first time yesterday. Which was nice. I think we need a little bit more time than the few minutes or however long we talked about it. But it does look like we're narrowing it down. I'm not sure if we're happy about it or not. It's weird.

And I'm wondering how I tell people? Should we make a big banner? Or just FB it like we did when we found out he got in, mass text? I dunno lol

So that's my update. My concerns, and then nothing really to go on :] I'm sure I just confused people more or frustrated them more about what we're doing! Sorry !